The door hasn’t closed.

Effective today, I am an unemployed bum without a bum.

Two weeks ago, the boss sent an email to all mechanics asking if any of us were interested in a seasonal layoff. The selling point was that we’d be eligible for employment insurance. Around this time of the year last year, I was working ~20 hours a week. I often came into the shop to do something other than fix bikes, such as organizing the nuts and bolts in the tiny drawers: it was bleak. Why have a repeat of that?

Before booking it from the shop, I made the boss pinky swear to rehire me in four months. He had a splinter on one pinky finger, but the other one still had loyalty coursing through it. Our right pinkies intertwined, manifesting an unbreakable contract.

I have a long list of arts and crafts projects I want to do. This sabbatical should give me the time to build a toddler, ie. learn how to crochet, finish sewing my first pair of pants before it’s shorts weather again, and tone up my glutes.

I spent almost the entire summer wearing shorts with an elastic waistband, thus postponing the realization that I’d lost weight. This has bumped up my power-to-weight ratio and also robbed me of whatever butt I had.

There’s very little meat on these bones.

Continue reading “The door hasn’t closed.”

Hell isn’t a place, it’s a vibe.

Oh! The creeping despair of losing an hour of daylight. Losing the will to wear shorts. Watching my garden wither and die. The season of decay has arrived.

October is almost here, and it’s time to let go of summer. I’ve been combating my Autumn Blues with thermal bibs, and soon, mitts. “How do you shift with mitts?” asked Alexa.

I can feel the paddle through a centimetre of insulation.

I’m treating myself to some aromatherapy with my latest scented candle purchase and draping my body in my technicolour dream-robe. I even bought a sweater for when I’m not ensconced in my robe. My bi-monthly (eh, more like tri-monthly) bouquet purchases are still happening.

It didn’t look that big in the store. What the fancy rich lady shit is this, right?

Continue reading “Hell isn’t a place, it’s a vibe.”

All the hearts.

Let’s get right into it:

On Tuesday, I received a text from my uncle telling me Opa was in the hospital with heart problems. I was told not to come and that he was doing ok.

My 99-year-old opa is in the hospital? How was I supposed to stay optimistic? I only had about 30 minutes left on the clock, so I told myself I could finish the bike I was working on.

I couldn’t do it. With 15 minutes to go, I bailed and walked my bike home as I was too distressed to ride. Upon arriving home, I crashed on the couch, exhausted from all my emotions. I woke up from my nap around 8pm and checked my phone.

Opa had a heart attack.

Continue reading “All the hearts.”