I have completed another orbit around the sun. Still no hamburger earmuffs. Although, a tufting gun made it onto my wish list a few days before my birthday. I assume nobody got me that tufting gun because they didn’t have enough time.
Before yesterday, I can’t remember ever having sunshine on my birthday. I used the need for a rubber eraser to go for a walk. Eraser was acquired, as was Vitamin D. Yes, it felt so good being twice the age of the majority. Then I got a text from the landlord suggesting they wanted to evict me ASAP.
I didn’t think anything could beat an alarm clock as the worst birthday gift I’ve ever received. (My parents gave me the clock so they didn’t have to wake me up for school anymore.)
As much as I enjoy sharing my thoughts, I like learning about other people too. I realized how much I miss the golden era of blogging while looking through Instagram (NOW OWNED BY META!). How is that, despite still being in a pandemic, everybody seems to be having an excellent time. IN NOVEMBER? Fuck off.
Sad clown. You can’t tell by this photo, but there was a teardrop painted on my face.
Blue-faced witch because the face paint packaging was labelled green when it was in fact blue.
Maggie was more surprised than she should have been when I revealed that I’d once been a cheerleader. We’d spotted zombie cheerleaders walking down the driveway of a mansion to collect their fun-sized treats when I made this revelation. I meant I’d been a cheerleader for Halloween.
You can be anything for Halloween, except for someone else’s culture.
Sadly, my costume this year was unrecognizable to all but one person. No wonder nobody could guess what I was making based on the photo in the previous blog post.
Right as my WordPress subscription auto-renewed, I took a two-week hiatus. Absence makes the heart grow fonder, right? Now that you’ve renewed your fondness for me, here’s a gif I made when I meant to write a post two weeks ago: