I lost my tracking device.

A week ago, my phone bricked. It was kind of my fault: its decline began in 2018 when I bailed off my bike with it in the back of my jersey pocket. The glass separated from the phone around the edges, and over time, pocket fluff began to accumulate under the glass. This created a permanent diffusion filter for my front-facing camera, giving the illusion that I was always in a sand storm. The fluff was likely also interfering with the ambient light sensor, causing my screen to flicker.

Life is pain, I know.

Nowadays, smartphones have up to 14 different sensors. With a replacement phone on the way, I’ve been looking at phone case options. Yann suggested the Otterb*x (I’m protecting you from ads), which suggests that he thinks I subject my phones to drops of 100 feet. (Oh, please. My previous phone died from firmware failure!)

I went with a biodegradable hippy-dippy case made from ground walnuts and eggshells, bound together by dried tree sap. When my next phone does die, I can plant the case and it’ll turn into a mighty oak. I admit the company eco-guilted me into going with them, instead of something cooler-looking.

I’m hoping this purchase will offset the environmental impact of discarding an $800 phone after under three years of use. 

Continue reading “I lost my tracking device.”

A second helping of backhanded helping hands.

Documentary: Betting on Zero

Click here to read the first part of this post.

We’ve all known someone who has been involved in an MLM (multi-level marketing) business. In the early 90s, I attended a Tupperware party as Mom’s accessory. The host had me reach into a bag for two prizes, which was a long, plastic spoon designed to extract maraschino cherries or olives out of their skinny jar and a serrated plastic scraper used for combing ridges in the icing around a cake. The reason I remember the prizes is because the host had to explain what they were. You know the prizes suck when they require an explanation.

An old Tupperware print ad showing a plastic device in the middle of a corn cob. The text says
A solution to a problem you did not know you had.

Continue reading “A second helping of backhanded helping hands.”

Putting Instagram to sleep.

Yann was brushing the snow off our car when a passerby stopped to wish him good luck with backing the car out of its spot. When Yann responded, “I’m not worried,” the man caught Yann’s Quebecois accent, and changed his mind, “You’ll be fine! You’ll be just fine!”

Yann is a parking legend, remember?

I was not there for the interaction, so this is based on a true story. I’m blogging for two now! I’ve suggested that Yann start a blog, but he insisted that people should not make their presence felt on the internet if they have nothing unique to add. However, I have successfully convinced a friend–who I first got to know through the early 2000s blogging platform, LiveJournal–to resurrect her blog.

Continue reading “Putting Instagram to sleep.”