Not to be cocky, but I’m pretty titillating.

With the recent surge in daily hits, I figured it was about time for an “about me” page to help any new readers decide whether I am “right for them”.

If you have extra time to piss away, do you want to be pissing here? I have carefully assembled a team of 269 words to help you make this decision.

What’s left to do is finding one or two recent photos of myself to help people decide whether they’d be able to stand seeing more photos of me.

For now, here’s a vintage gif of me licking a plastic hippo’s butt.