
Instead of continuing to argue with Yann about the varying quality of stunt mattresses, I am going to write about today’s bike ride in explicit detail.
Since my crash two weeks ago, this was the first bike ride worthy of wearing bib shorts. On Tuesday, I finished my antibiotics like a good patient, but came up with a new reason to visit the doctor: “My arm looks better but feels so much worse!”
This new doctor prescribed me some pale yellow tablets and promised me I’d be ready to wrestle a ManBearPig in under a week. As I was absolutely sure I wouldn’t be able to find a ManBearPig in the city, Yann and I cycled out to Oka (118km round trip).
I think everybody in Montréal headed for Oka today, only most took their cars. Yann and I passed a long string of motorists and their families (visible in the above photo) struggling to get to the waterslide park or the beach.
I miss being excited about scooting on my ass down a wet chute. How did I ever not mind standing in a long line-up wearing nothing but a wet bathing suit? Who taught me to be this annoyed by people?

I didn’t have to feel nervous about being back on my bicycle: my accident wasn’t caused by a car. Anyway, the waterslide park goers were moving slower than the turtles the sign warned us of.
Yann still needs to teach me how to do a proper bunny hop but for now, I’ll continue to unclip and lift my bike onto the curb like a dork.

Honestly, I’m not cool enough to be a part of Team Dream but their chubby bobcat logo was too cute to not stick on my road bike.
…I never did wrestle a ManBearPig.