20+ years ago, the internet gave birth to the “Jeff Goldblum is watching you poop” meme. This was the inspiration behind this week’s fridge statement, which evolves as the roomie or I swap out a word or two as we putter around in the kitchen.
“Jeff Bridges is helping you poop.”
Six weeks into my sabbatical, the Question of the Day remains unchanged.
What do I want to do today?
First, I’ll have some toast. While seemingly everybody I know needs an hour or two before eating anything, I wake up excited to eat toast. I have access to oatmeal (instant and delayed), apples, yogurt, eggs, and a whole bunch of other unconventional breakfast foods, yet every morning, I feel in my heart — and stomach — that I want toast. Options concerning breakfast do not overwhelm me.
Toast moves me.
As soon as those two pieces of toast are inside of me, the day unleashes its torrent of options.
So far, I have been correct in my assumption that the folks who overlook the self-checkout area in the evenings exercise diligence in proportionate to their pay grade. Yes, you be the zombies so that I can continue my vampiric grocery shopping habits. Thanks for not giving a shit about me ringing up my blood oranges as small navel oranges.
Continue reading “To be weeb or weird.”
Next to me, I have a fat, juicy to-do list for the weekend (Thurs-Sat, in my case). It is a mix of tasks I dread and projects I’m stoked about. I’ve also peppered it with everyday duties that would’ve been done even without this list. I put them on there for the added satisfaction of having extra items to cross off.
I’m already halfway through the list. Pay credit card: Done! Laundry: Folded and hung! Email ICBC: done even though I shouldn’t have had to do it. The claims specialist who is dealing with the property damage coverage side of things last emailed me on November 12.
“I appreciate your patience and will reach out once I have an update to discuss the next steps.”
Two weeks later, I sent them a breakdown of my ride file, complete with screenshots, hoping to expedite the decision. I never got a response.
And the email I sent today? I received an automated Out of Office notification.
I have continued to make good use of the new wheel, but I’ve yet to receive a reimbursement. Ever since I reactivated my Zwift membership, I’ve been parking my road bike in front of my laptop every other day. In my previous post, I shared screenshots showing the difference between my performance a year ago and on December 26, a week after getting back on the trainer after a three-month hiatus.
I did this workout again (Red Unicorn) last week. The results surprised me.
Continue reading “FJTD List.”Ah, 2025. This year marks my 25th year of blogging. On May 13, 2000, I published my first blog post. This May 13th, I shall celebrate this milestone by revealing my darkest, deepest secret.
Or maybe I’ll celebrate with cake.
I’ve assumed the form of Link again and been shot into the sky. 2025 goal number one: beat The Legend of Zelda: Tears of the Kingdom.
squaremeat.com 