When to yell at a deaf person.

I feel like the increase in demand for instant gratification has stripped people of the patience to communicate with me.

I had a dream this morning about getting into an altercation with two unfamiliar old ladies who insisted on communicating with me verbally through their masks. I responded, on paper, reminding them that I, too, would love to communicate seamlessly with the public, but because I dared to get sick as a child, I don’t get to do this. Think about it, I continued scribbling, you can’t deal with what I have to do 99% of the time, for five minutes. One of the ladies started bleeding at the fingertip and scribbled her response in blood, accusing me of being disrespectful, thus summoning the manager.

What a sinister bitch!

But that was a dream. In reality, I’ve had many people simply walk away from me upon learning that I can’t understand them even if they start yelling at me from behind their masks. The correct response from me is: “Fuck them.” But when it starts happening regularly, there are some days where I go, “Fuck me, right?”

I don’t like that I’m a misanthropist, but it’s hard not to be when you’re confronted with rude, ignorant people routinely. On the contrary, when strangers do something as simple as sign “thank you,” it brings me joy. This is an everyday interaction most people are accustomed to, but for me, it’s like, “Wow, you’re treating me like everybody else. You’re practically the kindest stranger I’ve interacted with all day. If not all week.”

Continue reading “When to yell at a deaf person.”

Boiling mad.

Hello friends and assorted readers.

In accordance with the updated covid protocols, the communal coffee machine and kettle have disappeared from work, leaving us to scramble for a new hot morning beverage source. My solution was to spend $40 on the largest insulated bottle I could find, 1.2L, to tote boiled water from home because I prefer to do all my teabagging at work.

On the left is a tall black flask decorated with a Krampus head sticker. Krampus has its long tongue out. In the middle is a double-walled stainless steel camp mug labelled LKVY and a sticker with an illustration of a tired cat drinking out of a mug. On the right is a nondescript espresso cup holding a discarded teabag.
My latest functionality requirements.

My desperation as a habitual tea drinker rivals that of coffee drinkers. At least I thought so until I found out that someone brought their camp stove so that they could heat some water for their Aeropresso in the loading bay. What did upper management think would happen? Or was this Bonnie Henry’s suggestion?

A poorly manipulated image showing Bonnie Henry "holding" a stainless steel electric kettle. The caption reads: "Flatten the curve: ditch the kettle."
Continue reading “Boiling mad.”