Category: sewing

A new way to floss.

~ Lkvy ~ Leave a comment

My new Patagonia running shorts made it look like I had wet myself after my run on Saturday. I’d ended the run at a local grocery store to pick up a big jar of honey, which I took great care to grip tightly as I was glistening with sweat. Then, I looked down and realized my “faded magenta” shorts appeared less faded around the crotch.

Then I pondered whether the fact that it was “just” crotch sweat made it less embarrassing. The shorts had dried by the time I got home, and I figured everyone I passed on the way was too busy looking at their phones to check out my dewy no-no area. Upon entering my suite, I hastily set the jar of honey on the kitchen counter. The glass jar tipped over and rolled off the counter.

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Collected sayings of Squaremeat.

~ Lkvy ~ 1 Comment

Dune is your 13th read! GO YOU.

-Zoée

Zoée also follows elite reader Kristen on StoryGraph. Kristen has basically met the reading goals Zoée and I set for ourselves this year. While I consider myself a competitive person, it’s become more intrinsic these days. I’m more inclined to bond over shared interests rather than whupping asses. I’m certain Zoée, like I, have resigned to having our asses whupped by the sandworm of bookworms, Kristen. All we want to do is surpass our 2025 numbers.

I spent 10 minutes making this in GIMP because I refuse to use AI!
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The physiognomy of the teen.

~ Lkvy ~ 2 Comments

I procured new goop that matches the colour of my skin last week. It’s not just a better match than the extra-tangy new formula MAC sent me, but better than the discontinued product I’d used since my 20s. It makes sense I’d find something better, as my complexion has changed after all this time: fewer bumps, but more grooves.

What else has changed? My beliefs, writing style, lifestyle, support system, eating habits, domain, and many more. Nearly every cell in my body has been replaced since I wrote my first blog post 25 years ago.

In case you missed it, I discuss popular sluts aka pluts:

Surely it served as an inspiration to one of the writers for Futurama as Popular Slut Club made an appearance in the 19th episode of season 6, which came out in 2011. (Thanks Jordi, for bringing this to my attention.) So, I’m taking credit for this.

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Achieve the stars.

~ Lkvy ~ 2 Comments

While in Vancouver, I asked Kristen, “Who’s the hottest character in Lord of the Rings?”

“Hmm… good question!”

Is it, though? I can’t even take credit: Zoée initiated it. I answered young Bilbo, but I’d forgotten about Aragorn. I hope that doesn’t mean Jordi will insist on me sitting through his annual LOTR marathon. I like the movies. They’re excellent movies. They’re fucking long, though, and I won’t be ready to commit to 12 hours of watching a stressed-out Frodo chase a ring anytime soon.

Jordi and I are also watching The X-Files. It’s not a show I watched when it was airing. I was a bit too young and alien-phobic when the series started. So far, the episodes are a hit or a miss. The makeup artistry is aggressively bad, except for the 2nd episode of the 2nd season. The show’s budget went towards their top-notch stunt drivers. Were Mulder’s collection of neckties intentionally ugly? I don’t know, but the truth is out there.

My latest accomplishment in Breath of the Wild is slaying my first Lynel. I was rewarded with a sweet bow that fires three arrows at once and hooves. So that I can make glue? No, to trade with one of the moaning fairies who’ll upgrade an item of clothing.

This is my latest real-life accomplishment…

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Blurred reality.

~ Lkvy ~ Leave a comment

A couple of days ago, I got ripped off by a married woman who was flirting with me. She wanted me to light the four torches around the goddess statue in Kakariko Village. She promised a reward.

As the torches stuck out of the water, I lit them using four fire arrows. My reward? 20 rupees. Each fire arrow costs 20 rupees!

But that was a few days ago. Since then, I’ve found and purchased multiple bomb, fire, electric, and ice arrows. I have bonded with three horses: Seacookie, Apples, and Bonbon. I’ve only owned the game for two weeks, and already I’ve played 70 hours, courtesy of COVID.

Link can take selfies with the Camera Rune:

Cycling through four poses. My horse, Bonbon, is in the background.
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