Red and White Day.

In my former home province of Québec, Montréal residents are pushing couches and fridges up those twisty death trap staircases. In the 4 years I lived in Montréal, I never had to move on what Québécois call Moving Day. There, if you decide on a moving date other than July 1st, you’re responsible for finding a new tenant to take over whatever remains of your lease.

It’s weird, I know.

But, it’s also weird how fervent Victorians are about Canada Day. Yann and I spent the day looping the roads on our bikes; neither of us wore red OR white. We passed many cyclists who had dressed for the occasion, many of who also had Canadian flags flapping behind them. (The only flag I own is the Catalan flag. I should have attached it to my bike just to confuse my compatriots.) I didn’t even ride my Masi, which is red; however, at the end of our ride, the back of my colonialist-hued skin had turned red. Although I had applied sunblock to my back, my sunburn from last Monday only got angrier.

That’s my best shitty talent: getting sunburnt in the blink of an eye.

Getting home meant we had to weave through a mob of overly jingoistic folks dressed in red and white, as we live in the proximity of the BC Parliament Buildings. Earlier in the day, a credit union was distributing red and white t-shirts for making a living flag on the Legislature lawn. I thought, “Wow, the things people will do for a *free* t-shirt.”

And this led me to think of how many people are okay with being a part of a crowd. Not only that, but a good portion of those people are… drunk. At 4 pm. 100% not my thing. I’m not pleased with the sunburn-on-top-of-a-sunburn that I got today. I should have worn a t-shirt rather than a tank top, even a freebie shirt from the credit union.

Victorians are big on freebies, but mostly second-hand freebies. The way they offer freebies is to leave it on street corners. A month ago, I scored six seasons of House MD on DVD.

HouseMDCollection

Here’s what I’ve passed up on:

  • an impressively large collection of toddler footwear, lined up neatly in rows
  • IceIceCubeTrayBaby
    Ice cube trays.
  • fax machine, complete with software
  • HamsterJail
    Penitentiaries for small rodents.
  • Same as above, but for birds
  • JesusStatuette
    A statuette of Jesus looking like an unholy mess while walking his dog.

And…

FreeSantaMug
Santa’s decapitated head as a drinking vessel.

For the Boomers, a festive holiday mug. After all, it’s only Baby Boomers who are able to afford seasonal houseware AND use them accordingly. The rest of us happily chug our tea out of Santa’s head year-round. Except for me, as I cannot deal with hard-to-clean novelty mugs, so I placed Santa’s empty head back in the bin.

I returned home mug-less to rub white cream on my red back.

Happy 152nd, Canada.

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