Wholly incomplete.

I made pizza tonight (no party to celebrate my success as a pizza chef, though) and used part-skim mozzarella instead of regular. This was a mistake. The leathery layer of cheese smothered the deliciousness of my homemade pizza. I hurt my feelings by producing a pizza fail after hundreds of successes. This is why there was no pizza party tonight.

You may be wondering if I got my bike frame, or you may not care at all. I’m going to see how many people care by forcing you to click through to read the rest of this post:

I did!

Here is my Black Forest Horse:

A brown toy horse with white mane and tail straddles the coral drive side chainstay of a bike. There is also a metallic blurple pattern of triangles painted on the chainstay.

Upon closer inspection, it’s straddling the chainstay of my glorious new bike! The grand reveal will have to wait as it’ll be another week before I can finish building it. There were a few parts I held off on ordering before the frame arrived because I wanted to ensure I had the correct measurements. Also, I forgot small things like a seatpost collar. Pfft, and I call myself a bike mechanic?

Yann asked if he could share a photo of my haphazardly assembled new bike on social media. I said yes, but with a caveat: he had to add as many spacers as possible to the uncut steerer tube before topping it off with the stem and handlebars. But he won’t do this because I’m the type to do troll-y things like this, not him. All this is to say that we’re getting along well at work.

The frame was delivered on Wednesday morning, prompting me to show up at work on my day off. I clipped panniers filled with bike parts to the Masi and rolled it outside my place. Then, because safety comes first, I put on my helmet and reached for the adjuster dial.


I agree that wearing a bike helmet is up to the individual, but I cannot believe anyone would choose otherwise. I’ve had two falls that resulted in a cracked helmet! I’m not willing to gamble brain damage to feel the wind blow through my hair.

Sympathetic to my plight, Yann, who also wasn’t working, stopped by my place within fifteen minutes to loan me his helmet because he’s also been kind to me outside of work. I have a new helmet on order. In the meantime, my think shell will be protected by one of the bike shop’s test ride helmets. I hope I don’t get head lice again.

The mess that is my work schedule had me off today as well. Once again, as I was about to leave the house, something forced a delay. It was the sight of an empty driveway: both my landlords were gone!


Now I’ve mounted seven works of art, including the one featuring the world’s most famous carpenter: Jesus. While not quite as adept with a hammer as Jesus was, the shortage of nails was what stopped me from hanging the remaining fourteen pieces. For the time being, Fresco Jesus looms in the bedroom, giving me the side eye, judging me for my unfinished businesses.

Animated gif zooming into a canvas painting of Fresco Jesus.
Christ, I’m hilarious!

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